SEX ADDICTION – EFFECTS OF SEX ADDICTION - PRAISE FOWOWE

We are putting this up on popular demand.  We receive lots of phone calls, Text, Whatsapp and BB Messages on how to stop Masturbation. Below is a write up by Praise Fowowe an International sexuality education strategist/Advisor, family life coach and crisis manager. if you are addicted or not, based on the problems you are facing at the moment. And some of you want to know how to get out of sex addiction. Read Below.

I need to let you know that it is not enough to just assume that you are addicted to sex until you take the test you can’t be too sure. I will advice you give me a call so that you can take the addiction test then for those of you that wants to get out of it. You also need to call so that we can fix meetings and go through the sex recovery module. I know it is possible to be free from sex addiction.

Today I will continue from where I stopped the last time and consider the effects of sex addiction and if possible start on how we can get out of sex addiction.

Effects of Sex Addiction

- Low self esteem- Just like other forms of addiction, sex addicts usually suffer from low self-esteem especially the ladies among them. Some of the men think that it boosts their ego but it is still a case of inferiority complex because you don’t need sex to prove that you are a man. Sex addiction leads to emptiness and depression, addicts always want something extra. The whole essence of engaging in the activity is to satisfy the uncontrollable urge in order to become normal but they soon realize that they want something more or that they are not yet complete. This ultimately lead a lot of them into drugs.

- Disgrace and distrust – I don’t know how it feels as the head of the biggest company in your country to be caught pants down several times with school girls or to be accused by 7girls of sexually assaulting them. It is disgraceful infact it has led some men into suicide because of the publicity generated by such. Because some sex addicts are big shots they try to cover up their tracks till the bean spills open one day and all the empire they have built comes crashing down. People no longer trust them and girls run away from them because they now have the reputation of being child abusers. Some of them are eventually disgraced out of office, end up behind the bars while so may of them never recover from the disgrace. If there is anything that has destroyed the reputation of a lot of men who have great destinies, it is a sex problem that was not properly dealt with.

- Stagnancy – Some of them become stagnant such that they find it so hard to move forward in their endeavors because their mind is filled with loads of secrets that they have to cover up. They are threatened by the girls that they have used and it has become so hard to sleep. Their work and family begins to suffer and they are filled with so much guilt that some of them sink into depression.

- Generational problems – Because sex is not only physical; it is also spiritual. They have picked up so many things they never had originally from their multiple partners, which they have also deposited into their wife, and the traits are now evident in their children. A lot of fathers have brought a strange disease upon their families by engaging in sex with another woman outside wedlock. Some fathers had their generation cursed for having sex forcefully with an underage.

- Barrenness – This could be due to multiple abortions or complications resulting from abortion. There were ladies that lost their womb while in their state of addiction only to become married and now in search of a child.

- Exposure to STIs – Because they must have sex, they don’t care with whom, where and how? I remembered losing a one-time room mate to AIDS as a result of sex addiction. It was as bad as this guy having sex with food vendors, bread hawkers and even those Fulani girls that hawk “Fura”. A lot of them have contracted STIs that they are not even aware of so they go ahead spreading it to others.

- Depression – They slip into depression because there is a longing in their heart that is not being satisfied. A lot of them are scared of what people would say if they realized what they had been doing and such could become suicidal.

- Broken relationships and marriages – The addiction affects their immediate family because they could go as far as having sex with their sister in-law, cousins and even their neighbors. Sometimes they also want to force their spouse to act in a particular way during sex (what they saw in porn), which could be offensive. Eventually their spouse gets tired and the marriage breaks. It affects their children as well because they become children from dysfunctional homes. So many of my clients confessed to seeing their fathers have sex with other women in the house while they were young. That affected the sex lives of so many of them. A lot of infants suffering from AIDS got it from one of the parents.

- Other addictions - Finally they become addicted to other addictives such as drugs and others.

I need to let you know that the most important sex organ you have just as my mentor taught me is not your genital but your mind. So the greatest work as far as sex addiction is concerned has to take place in the mind. Until the mind changes your sex life may never change.

However I need to also say that until you see your sex life as a problem you are not going to be geared towards getting a solution. We celebrate sexual prowess in this part of the world but the same thing we celebrate eventually ruin a lot of us. It is possible that you are having a field day now and you think you are ok because no one is raising a highbrow. That could be due to the fact that you are not yet a newsmaker or a celebrity. The day you become a role model you will be amazed that the same thing that you never considered a problem is what the people will use to bring you down. So I tell people that the best time to get it right is now. A lot of people that got married as a way out of sex addiction had been disappointed because it never solved their problems because they soon found themselves in the arms of other women. What you fail to deal with now has all it takes to deal with you. Until you acknowledge the problem as it is and get help it remains it doesn’t matter the height you get to if it has not been dealt with, it remains.

In order to get out of sex addictions there are some specific steps you can take that can get you out but I need to tell you that I may not be able to treat everything here. These are steps that I have seen work over and over again. You may see yourself improve and find yourself back in the problem the most important thing is you have to believe that it is possible to be free from sex addiction. If you can believe it then it is possible.

Way out of sex addiction

- Acknowledge the problem and take responsibility for it – If you keep blaming others for your situation then you are not going to move forward. Accept the fact that you caused it and that you will also change the situation.

Desire to change – If you are enjoying your state then the willingness to change won’t be there. You must develop a perfect hatred for the situation you have found yourself. If you have seen multiple sex partners as fun before, now see it as death. A proof of your desire to change is your pursuit of a counselor and following the action plans. To be continued READ HERE