PLEASE READ: ARE YOU COMPATIBLE IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP/MARRIAGE?

We hear people say: of cos we are compatible, am 35 he's 37, we are both matured. Am working with an oil company she is self employed and doing well financially. Haba Doc, we are not kids nah! Well, let's see how compatible both of you are.

What is Compatibility?

According to the dictionary compatibility is a state in which two things are able to exist or occur together without problems or conflict.

Let me add that compatibility is also change, meaning you Can Change, you Will Change, you Have change. Change is one of the effective ingredient in a relationship/marriage i.e. if one is ready to accept it. If you don't accept or want change, it means you are "Perfect" and have no need to grow. But you know the truth, we are not "Perfect" being but working towards perfections.

Relationship/Marriage with a reflection of compatibility have a mutual knowledge. It means both partners have become teachers and learners in their journey. Without this your relationship/marriage could be in trouble. 

Mutual knowledge is a gentle process that involves positive models, attitudes or behaviour, willingness, flexibility and change, encouragement, sensitive notifications, avoid blames or rebukes and above all believing in your partner's ability to change and succeed. 

Let's see some areas you should be compatible in:

Intellectual Compatibility: this is one of the component in a relationship/marriage, but doesn't mean you MUST have the same qualifications, same number of degree or maybe attend the same school and have the same training. We all have different patterns of learning, so being in a relationship/marriage gives that opportunity for one to learn and grow from each other.

You maybe an avid reader, doesn't mean he/she must be like you. The other might just be a learner, this could be as a result of time for the other person. So both must be open to challenges from the other person's insight, knowledge, opinions and growth. The most important is respecting each other's abilities and difference in this area and work towards making it a success. Do not for any reason rub your I too know attitude on your partner, that's a way of saying they are dumb.

Emotional Compatibility: If this isn't there, then a lot will go wrong in that relationship/marriage:

• both become emotionally starved and vulnerable to an affair outside the relationship/marriage.
• Live as married singles in the case of married couples.
• Head for breakup or divorce if married.

It is very possible for a relationship/marriage to experience all of the above. We once counseled a couple who experienced all these in their marriage and healing process wasn't an easy one and one party was bent on divorce. 

Women tend to be more adept at sharing their feelings and they have a high sense of intuition, that is one great gift from God to women. The society have helped in encouraging this tendency. This is not a strength for men and it doesn't occur naturally to all men, so they have to work for it. Most men were raised handicapped in this area. That is why women are very emotional and sensitive with issues concerning the heart. Most men were not encouraged to be aware of their feelings, nor develop a way of sharing them. All these can be corrected because it is very possible to learn if willing.

If one is nonemotional, your feeling will and can never meet up with your partner's feeling, unless you consciously develop yours to meet up. 

Spiritual Compatibility: Now note that this is the most important of all Compatibility. we usual advise one marries from their religion as we have different ways of communication in this areas. Even the moslems and christian have different way in their religion, talk-less of inter religion marriage.

But you see, the fact that you marry a Christian or a Moslem or a Buddhist etc doesn't automatically mean your both compatible. This is just another area but very important. Your compatibility here is not measured by attending the same church, mosque, temple or worship centre. or maybe have the same spiritual gifts, or attend the church, mosque, temple or worship centre 5 times daily or in a week.

This has to do with your relationship with God your maker, what you believe (your beliefs), who you believe, your faith and experiences through your unique personalities with God. The importance and values you both place as a guide for your life, your theology about life. You must be able to talk about your spiritual weaknesses and strengths. Respect each other spiritual uniqueness, discuss and share spiritual materials together, kind of music you like, your spiritual mentors and most importantly pray together and for each other and encourage each other to grow spiritually. What is your spiritual statement? If this isn't in place work towards it or end the relationship.

Next we will be looking at Communication Manners and Expectation/Goals/Vision

Don't forget Registration is ON for Our Last Summit for 2015 

Relationship/Marriage summit! 

Saturday, 19th December 2015
STAR DIAMOND EVENT CENTER,
4/6 Ojodu - Abiodun, Kosoko Road,
Ojodu Berger (Opposite the T-Junction)
Time: 12:30pm
Ticket: 1,500 only, per person
Daniel/Ikana Akpata
0163042597
GTB
Or at the venue

Featuring:
THE SUCCESS STORY

For Registration/Seat Reservation and Booking please Contact:(With your full name and Phone number)

Email: ikandaniel@gmail.com

WhatsApp: +2348023810372 OR Text:08023810372

BBM: 58A68259