I don't know who to blame, myself, my parents, my pastor or my friends. But my marriage is a mess because I was in a hurry. Mr name is Stanley am an importer, I deal with electronics currently in China for a business deal, am 34 years old, got married 4 years ago in the name of Love or should I say Obedient.
My wife is 23 years old, I married her when she was 19 because my pastor, parents and friends thought she was the right person for me. I knew nothing about marriage when I got into this marriage. For 4 years plus I have kept this secret from the world and I cant hide it anymore, I need help. Our marriage have produced 2 kids that are not mine.
My pastor and parents were so convinced my wife was a virgin when I married her, I met Nkem (my wife) when she was 17, her parents and my parents worship in the same center and have being friends for years. They saw her as an innocent girls with all the wife quality and being their only son they thought she was the best for me. I wasn't ready for marriage because I wasn't sure I had all the qualities. With so much pressure from my parents and pastor I gave in and we got married when she turned 19.
My wife refused me sleeping with her after we got married in the name of "she is a virgin" and it will be painful. For months I kept bearing and begging my wife only to find out she was 3 months pregnant for her boyfriend she claimed she had nothing to do with. She begged me and confessed she was sorry and didn't want our parents or pastor to know about it. I agreed and forgave her on the condition she shouldn't do that again, but because it happened before our wedding. Till she gave birth we didn't have sex, after child birth she claim she wants to recover fully since she did CS, then our marriage was a year plus.
After a year and nine months for the first time she allowed me make love to her, I was delighted and happy but didn't know she had her plans, Few months after she told me she was pregnant, that was the greatest news in the history of our marriage because my wounds was healed of the previous pregnancy. Nkem was pregnant for her boyfriend again I was shattered after I read a message on her phone telling her boyfriend their plan worked as I think am responsible for her pregnancy. I confronted my wife and show her the message, she cried and cried for day asking for forgiveness that she will never repeat that again. Am so shattered since I married this girl, I have lived as a single man, to make love to my wife is an issue, to take her out is a problem, to cook for me is wahala. My wife spends all her time shopping and chatting on the phone, her friends comes over everyday. Our home is lawless, I have given this woman everything I can afford to make life sweet for her and her kids. I love Our (her boyfriend) kids so much.
Am shattered, I need help. What do I do, I don't want to divorce I want my marriage to work. Am willing to make it work. Please help me.
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